Former-Member
Not applicable

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hey @tonys thats just terrible what you have been through. I had no idea. I'm so sorry you have been so unwell lately. So THAT is the reason why! I'm glad you're back and am pleased you are re-gaining your mind and body slowly.  What a thing to go through. Gee you've experienced quite a lot in such a short space of time. You must be feeling tired and overwhelmed. It must be so difficult...Sending healing thoughts your way

 

Yes I'm still walking around the place and trying to stay healthy. Was headed for a heart attack/stroke in doctors own words several times. Have been able to get BP and weight down.  High BP runs in the family. Please keep in touch. I have thought of you in the interim and wondered what happened but it sounds like you are recovering your strength after this gruelling ordeal.

 

Keep going Tonys! Just remember lots of guts and determination will get you there my friend. 

Re: Trying makes it worse

Take good care of your health @Former-Member , you matter!!!

Thanks for your amazing care to @tonys , we are thrilled he is ok and I'm so happy to be connecting again 

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @TAB thanks for your support earlier even when you have yourself been dealing with hospital and setting up your home etc...

 

I feel much better

 

I have decided to take the loss and move on .

 

I wanna put in a good fight for my mental health and not allow one man to impact me so negatively not giving him more airtime

 

My own health is all I need to deal with now and not sit around being down .

 

I can try keep moving and fighting

The hurt has subsided a tiny bit and I didn't self harm

Re: Trying makes it worse

very good @EternalFlower  what is your plan for the rest of your night then ???

Re: Trying makes it worse

https://youtu.be/7Xo28RwDCSE?si=lTI-K4sMutbAAncM  been watching this..

@EternalFlower 

The legendary Ghostrider of Stockholm Part 1.

Re: Trying makes it worse

Love it @TAB , how did everything go today are u feeling better?

 

I am running a load of washing as my new place has a washing machine

Didn't eat meals yet but feels positive I'm starting back to do housework as I've otherwise been living in a pigsty

Otherwise watching Seinfeld. I don't have the internet yet here so just on my phone no idea when the data will run out or how it's still working 

Re: Trying makes it worse

well sounds good then , got tv and wmach . @EternalFlower  enjoy your cleaning, not sure how much long can last here.

Re: Trying makes it worse

thankyou @Former-Member  You know,  reading your letters, i'm always left feeling like I've just guzzled down one of your supper sports drinks.  Feel pumped without having to put the work in.  

So,  what are we going to do about that blood pressure problem of yours. I guess you're doing it before I've even thought of it.  Mine has always been too low.  Maybe if we are friends, It'll all even out. . 

 

Docs been on the tools this morning and the stainless trays gradually filling up with swarth.    Ouch ! ,

Its not the pain that concerns me.  Her  quick set concrete  words of discipline leave me wondering if a small part of her is deriving some pleasure from my fear.     Well, . . . Little does she know,  a large part of me is deriving some sort of pleasure from thinking this.  

 

Think I need another seminar from appleblossom.    Now I remember you served in the theatre of war they call " the corporate world" .  It can take a lot to come down from those adrenalin highs and cold blood lows on the slippery floor of the killing room.  I forgot what you did to escape but strips of you remain on the barbed wire  I  imagine. Some days the world just looks at us with those cold  gunmetal   eyes.  With a kind hand from our friends,  we summon the courage to stare it down.

 

You'll just keep running till one day its all run out of you.         Run  Forest    run. . .

 

I admire you very much @Former-Member .

 

Hope its ok if I say a quick high to @Appleblossom   @EternalFlower   @TAB  @Oaktree @Shaz51 

  @tyme  @Sophia1 @Owlunar  @StuF  and all the other beautiful folk. 

When they are done basting this side of me,  its back in the oven with the apple in my mouth   "to shut me up"  and I'll be,   outta business for the arvo. 

 

Always smiling   and hope you folk are too.                        very best to all              tonys.

 

Re: Trying makes it worse

Do you have another little gem from your journal for me @EternalFlower .   I'm going too look out for them my friend.  Take care mate.               tonys.

Re: Trying makes it worse