Lived Experience Forum

[Twilightsomniac]

Ive been really stressed out lately and have had self harm ideation. 

TW: Self-harm

Content/trigger warning

To negate this I've been pinching my arm.

When I went to the dr he got me to do that question thingy and I answered honestly but I answered no to self harm but when I explained to the dr the small bruises on my arm is from pinching myself he said I should have answered yes 

This upsets me because I haven't self harmed in a long time and this stops me from doing what I normally do to self harm 

[PinkFlamingo]

Hey there @Twilightsomniac 🌺

Im really sorry to hear there's been extra stress that is contributing to self harm ideation, and it's getting in the way of you doing what you normally do. 

I was wondering if the stressors can be helped by some supports, or if there are any positive coping mechanisms that you would like to try, instead? 

hoping to kindly provide some suggestions, and I hope its helpful in some way, otherwise please know that I hope things can improve for you xx

[Jynx]

@Twilightsomniac I can totally understand how this would have been quite a shock to hear hun. I echo @PinkFlamingo's sentiments about finding some positive coping strategies. One idea is to chew on some ice, or snap a rubber band against skin. In terms of our biology, when we experience pain our brains release endorphins and dopamine to try to alleviate the distress, hence doing something that can still stimulate those receptors, but does no damage. Some other things to try -

Delay: for example, put it off until you have spoken to someone
Distract: for example, go for walk, play a game
Divert: for example, find an activity which has a similar effect to self-harm, but without causing injury, such as punching a pillow, drawing on arm instead of cutting, squeezing an icecube
Deep breathing: or other relaxation method

We've also got some ideas for self-care for self-harm that could be helpful too. 

I hope this helps, and remember we're here for you if ever you need to chat about what's been happening for you that's been so stressful 💜

[Twilightsomniac]

Thanks @Jynx and @PinkFlamingo 

I will try to do something else but lately it's become an unconscious reaction to feeling overwhelmed. Despite the bruises I just didn't consider it a form of self harm 

[Jynx]

@Twilightsomniac ultimately it is your decision how you define it. If it's something you're worried about, or it's impacting your life in a negative way (e.g. physical injuries aside, sometimes when self-harm is visible it can impact our social lives), then perhaps seeking some extra support for it/finding some other ways of alleviating distress is the way to go - and developing those extra coping skills regardless is probably a good idea too. But if it's creating more distress for you to have your gp label it as SH, or creating a sense of shame for you to think of it that way, you don't have to see it that way. Your opinion, your experience, is what matters most.

[PinkFlamingo]

Hey there @Twilightsomniac 🌺 I hope you’ve been ok this last few days 💜

I wondered if any techniques mentioned have been useful for you? Please only reply if you feel comfortable to do so 🙂

I think recognising self harm when overwhelmed and distressed isn’t easy - we are already very occupied and so objectively recognising self harm for what it is I feel doesn’t come ‘naturally’. I feel that this contributes to how self harm happens.

go gently, and sending you a big hug 🫂🙂🦩