Skip to main content
Skip to main content
menu
Home Forums

Forums

Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

  • 47,612Members
  • 1,257,762Posts
  • 1,400,000Visitors

Spotlight

Shoulder to Shoulder: Veteran Families
Shoulder to Shoulder: Veterans
IMPORTANT UPDATE!!! Temporary Overnight Moderation Changes
tyme

1 day ago

IMPORTANT UPDATE!!! Temporary Overnight Moderation Changes

Hi forum community,   We want to let you know about a short-term change to how we moderate posts overnight. We are short staffed for our night shifts at the moment, and will be training new team members to help, so posts made between 12am and 6am will not be posted live straight away.   What this means for you:  Posts made between 12am–6am will be held for review and released shortly after 6am.  From 7am onwards, posts will be moderated as usual and posts will be live.  This will start from Monday July 7th and last for about 2 weeks; We’ll keep you updated here.   We made this plan with consideration around what has the least impact to the community while maintaining the safe and supportive environment we all value so much here. We are really grateful for your understanding as this will allow for us to properly bring in the new staff for night shifts.    While you wait for a post to appear overnight, it might be a good chance to check out some helpful threads such as: Help with Sleep   Mindfulness Winding Down If you are needing extra support in those time frames these resources are available to you: Lifeline: 13 11 14 or Crisis Chat Suicide call back service: 1300 659 467 or online counselling If in immediate danger: 000 Thanks for working with us through this adjustment time everyone! 

Read discussion
11
6
Saturday Soiree - 19th July 2025
Friends, Family and Carers, Fancy a Cuppa and a Chat, Connect now
Morning Check-In
SANE Forum Newsletter: AI Pets
Ainjoule

3 days ago

SANE Forum Newsletter: AI Pets

Hey all, I put my hand up for helping with AI (Artificial Intelligence) images and pets for the forum newsletter. We were thinking of combining the two and having AI generated images of our pets. I thought I'd post and see if there was any interest in having your pet featured in the newsletter in this way. To give an example, here is my puppy (Zigi) when she was a little younger: Zigi on my lapZigi in the carZigi sleeping And here are two AI generated images of Zigi (after giving AI the above pictures to work with): Zigi cartoonZigi Pawdust Is anyone interested in having your pet featured through AI art? We would need a 2 or 3 relatively clear pictures of your pet to give to AI (ChatGPT) to see what it could come up with. And maybe a little about your pets for some ideas of how to feature them. If anyone already had immortalised their pet with AI art and don't mind it being posted to the newsletter you could also submit that here. Thanks. 

Read discussion
4
11
Wind-down Wednesdays
rav3n

4 days ago

Wind-down Wednesdays

Welcome to Wind-down Wednesdays where we work through a new grounding or soothing tool on every second Wednesday! 🌺 The purpose of this thread is To learn more about various grounding/soothing strategies (can add them into your self-care toolbox) To understand why we do it and how it works in calming us down To create a safe space for members to visit whenever they need to wind down and catch their breath. You can work on the strategy by yourself here, or tag community members to join you (please be mindful of our guidelines - remember that members may not always respond immediately, and let’s not place pressure on others to respond) Promote self-care and self-reliance in regulating your emotions! Got a grounding tool/soothing strategy you’d like to share on this thread? Email us (team@saneforums.org) to let us know and we’ll save you a Wednesday slot! 😊   The first grounding tool we’ll be exploring is the 3-3-3 technique. 3-3-3: Name 3 things you see: scan the space around you. For each item you identify, really focus on the details of it – what colour is it? Is it heavy or light? Big or small? What’s the texture of the object? Name 3 things you hear: what are some sounds near you or far from you, are they soft or loud? Listen closely to identify them. Move 3 parts of your body: it can be light or dramatic movements such as slowly rolling your shoulders, clenching and unclenching your fists, wiggling your fingers and toes, jumping up and down, shaking your wrists, etc.   So how does this work? Well, when we’re feeling anxious and overwhelmed, it can sometimes trigger a stress response where our body’s fight-flight-freeze system is activated, which you can learn more about here: The Four 'F' Trauma Responses - SANE Forums. This system is typically activated when our body identifies a physical threat, our body enters a heightened state of arousal to help survive – this can look like increased heart rate, increased muscle tension, decreased appetite, etc. When our anxious thoughts keep activating this heightened state of arousal, it can lead to a very dysregulated nervous system where our bodies keep reacting out of proportion to the threat, making it hard to calm down. Moving our focus from internal things (like anxious thoughts/feelings) to external things (like what we can see/hear), helps us slow things down and calm the stress response. It gives our body a chance to focus on things that it perceived as non-threatening (i.e. identifying a cup or a bird flying around), which gives our body a chance to slowly calm down. Practicing grounding techniques regularly can help regulate the nervous system with time. For more information, feel free to read this article: 3-3-3 Rule for Anxiety: How to Use, Scientific Basis, Other Coping Strategies Now let’s give it a go! Feel free to share the 3 things you saw, heard and the 3 body parts you moved – and any other reflections you’d like to add. 

Read discussion
11
33
Name Our Community Newsletter!
rav3n

12 days ago

Name Our Community Newsletter!

Hey everyone! 💗 Our EOI for the forums newsletter is now closed. If you’ve expressed interest to us, you would’ve received an email already – if you haven’t, please let us know. Thank you to everyone who’s put their hand up for this round, we’re so excited for this project and keen to see everyone's pieces!! For anyone who missed out, don’t worry – there’ll be more opportunities when we do future newsletters! Now onto our next stage… deciding on a title for the newsletter! The forums newsletter is: a recovery-focused space for the SANE Forums community, created by the SANE Forums community and we’d like a title that really encompasses those 2 values. If you have a title you’d like to suggest for consideration, please post it below – the posted title with the most likes (and that meets the criteria above) by July 18th 2025 will be chosen for the newsletter! Looking forward to seeing everyone's ideas!! ✍️

Read discussion
4
10
Hearing voices and psychosis 🗯️
RiverSeal

8 days ago

Hearing voices and psychosis 🗯️

Hey Forums friends,   If you are like me and you have experienced hearing voices and maybe even had a psychotic episode, then this is a thread to share your experiences and have discussions!   I have shared some of my story and recovery journey here in responding to Members, and I also did the Lived Experience of Hearing Voices Webinar in late 2024, and the Topic Tuesday, Living a Meaningful Life with Schizophrenia, in mid-2022. My mental health experience is hearing voices and experiencing delusions. I have had many psychotic episodes and been on the mental health ward many times, diagnosed with schizophrenia in 2016 after 9 years of misdiagnosis (Borderline Personality Disorder with drug-induced psychosis), been on the DSP, and I am an NDIS participant. In 2017, I started studying at TAFE and I now have 6 qualifications in NDIS, Community Services, Alcohol and Other Drugs, Sexual Violence and Mental Health Peer Work. I work with people who experience complex mental health, AOD, and gender identity issues and use my lived experience to provide peer support.   Most of the challenges I have experienced happened over 9 years, from 2007 to 2016, when I started experiencing psychotic episodes and presenting to ED at least 9 times, resulting in 7 hospital mental health ward admissions. However, in late 2001, I was overseas and had a breakdown which led to AOD misuse, unstable housing and extremely heightened emotions for 1 year until I returned to Melbourne. On my return to Melbourne, I misused AOD, and even though I worked several jobs to get by, I was experiencing many other life challenges, anxiety, and depression. As a result of my first psychotic episode in 2007, I lost my long-term girlfriend, career, job, I put on a lot of weight from the antipsychotics, started smoking and lost my fitness, lost my passion for mountain biking, swimming and the gym and had to go bankrupt. In 2009, after my second psychotic episode, I mostly gave up misusing AOD and started working with a. psychiatrist and taking my antipsychotic as prescribed, but was not very engaged in my treatment as I believed the alternate reality that was my voices and delusions.   In 2016, I had a turning point in my life and started my recovery journey with what at the time seemed like an insurmountable challenge. I had my diagnosis changed from BPD with drug-induced psychosis to schizophrenia, and I thought that my life was over. I only knew the stigma and discrimination that I had heard, and I thought that if I had schizophrenia, I was not in a good position to put it politely. I went home and looked up schizophrenia online, and I immediately identified with the diagnosis as it sounded like someone had written about my life. I literally thought that if I could sit on a couch and watch TV, that was what I expected I could do for the rest of my life, if I was lucky. Somewhere deep inside me I was not willing to accept this and I engaged with my treating team, researched everything I could find about schizophrenia, watched endless YouTube videos on other people and recovery stories, took my medication as prescribed and made countless mistakes trying to find a way to exist in the loneliness and isolation that was my life living interstate from my family and having been abandoned by people I used to call friends.   My recovery journey from that place I was not willing to accept feels like wading through water, not knowing what direction the shore is in, how far it is, or how long it will take to get there. I’m still not there, and I believe I will be in recovery for the rest of my life. Along the way, I have met some people who supported me, believed in me and gave me opportunities. I have also had even some of the same people and others say the cruellest and most insensitive things, holding me back by not accepting that I am creating a new life that is meaningful and purposeful. I learned that I truly need to believe in myself and my abilities, hone in on my values and beliefs, and never accept less than what I deserve. Recovery is so hard and so challenging, and to walk the recovery journey path, you just need to put one foot in front of the other and keep moving forward, and it will reveal what is uniquely your experience.     As you might be able to imagine, over 20 + years, there were many challenging situations, not to mention that I was also trying to process my gender identity, as I identify as a transgender woman. This is really just in a nutshell to keep it from being an essay, so please ask questions and be curious if there is anything that you want to understand more deeply!   Let’s create some discussion, and here are some questions (but not limited to) to get us started:   What are some of the challenges you are facing in your recovery?   What supports, services and resources do you regularly engage with in your recovery?   What does recovery look like to you?   What have you learned in recovery that may support another Member?   We also want to hear about your experiences, so if you feel comfortable, please share your story, your challenges and what you have learned!   We all have it within ourselves to live a meaningful and fulfilling life with or without symptoms    RiverSeal ❤️   Just tagging in some Members who may be interested in this thread!!   @Egonza @Patchworks @maddison @Millielulu @TAB @A0ri021 @LW1969 @Elisena @Judi9877 @Eve7 @StuF @Meredyth49 @DIDJane @Dk5 @MissRenae08  @MeerkatMonsta @Hope @recovery @Libra @Cleo2 @Jaybee12321 @sol_87  @Paperdaisy @MDT @boofhead73 @Anon1975 @Bunniekins @Hemlock @Krishna  @Dimity @Dreamy @Eden @creative_writer     

Read discussion
13
33
RECORDING: The Hidden Impact of Military Service on Families of Veterans
Ru-bee

about 1 month ago

RECORDING: The Hidden Impact of Military Service on Families of Veterans

In this FREE 60-minute webinar, Ruth Clare, author of Enemy and renowned lived experience speaker, will explore the often-unseen impacts of military trauma on the families of veterans - Watch the recording below   This webinar will explore:  Personal stories and reflections from Ruth’s journey growing up in a veteran household  The emotional and psychological effects of military trauma on children and partners  Links between PTSD, domestic violence, parenting and relationship challenges, and alcohol use  The impact of adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) and why supporting children of veterans is essential  Tools and strategies Ruth found most effective for her healing journey    Includes community Q&A.    About Ruth Clare  Ruth Clare is the award-winning author of Enemy, a memoir about growing up as the child of a Vietnam veteran. She is also a TEDx and keynote speaker, qualified scientist, coach, and copywriter. Her work combines compelling storytelling, research, and practical tools to support others facing trauma to create thriving lives. Her TEDx talk, The Pain of Hiding Your True Self, has reached over half a million viewers, and her next two books, Beyond Fight Flight Freeze Fawn and Turn Fear into Courage, will be published this year.       

Read discussion
4
0
How to Create a SANE Forums Account
Ru-bee

about 1 month ago

How to Create a SANE Forums Account

Hello! For those who are interested in the SANE forums, maybe you have spent some time taking a look around and reading threads and are now wondering how to get involved, here’s a quick guide for how to sign up and sign in to the SANE forums. Let’s start with an overview of why you might like to sign up: The SANE forums are a free, anonymous space to access peer to peer support, and is accessible 24/7 on any device They are moderated by mental health professionals for safety and support Open to adults in Australia living with mental health issues, their families, friends, and carers How to Start an Account Go to the SANE Forums Website: saneforums.org    Register for an Account Click “Sign up” to create an account. Fill in the registration form: Create a unique username (do not use your real name or a name that might be otherwise identifiable for privacy) Provide a valid email address and basic personal information Set a secure password Agree to the Terms & Conditions and Community Guidelines Don’t forget to click “Sign up” Confirm Your Email Check your email inbox for a confirmation message (don’t forget to check your junk folder too!) Click the link in the email to activate your account. How to Log In Return to saneforums.org Click “Log In” Enter Your Username and Password Use the details you created during registration. Access the Forums Once logged in, you can: Read and join discussions Post questions or comments Connect with others for support Some extra notes: You can browse and read forum posts without registering, but you must create an account to post or interact. SANE Forums are anonymous and moderated 24/7 to ensure safety and privacy. Only one account per person is allowed, and you must be over 18 and living in Australia. If you have trouble registering or logging in, visit the site’s help section or contact SANE Support Services. Safety Note:SANE Forums are not a crisis service. If you need urgent help, contact Lifeline (13 11 14) or emergency services (000).

Read discussion
6
0
✨Sunday Intention Setting✨
AuntGlow

4 days ago

✨Sunday Intention Setting✨

Hello lovely people, I have been reflecting on some ways we can support you all through our recovery-oriented way of connecting on the forums, and thought that creating a weekly intention setting/reflection conversation could be really helpful. 🥰 Intention-setting can allow us to more mindfully focus our attention onto the things we would like to explore more of (without too much pressure!). And when we do so within community, it can help us to feel more supported as we go about exploring new habits and ideas. Now, this isn't about showing up perfectly or reaching all of our 'goals' overnight, but rather, exploring what is possible, what we enjoy, and how we can feel more safely connected to ourselves.  So, what will this look like exactly? 1. Set your intention for the week. For example, I am going to practice allowing myself 5 minutes a day to slow down. 2. Reflect. You can do this throughout the week via your notes app, a journal, or here on the forums. *Notice what feels good, what doesn't, and why.  3. Share the following Sunday. Let us know what you were able to explore and what came up for you/if you have any questions or need some support.  Remember - there is no right or wrong! It's so fine if all you did was hold the intention in the back of your mind - change takes time. I would love you all to have fun with this and to explore things from a place of curiosity and compassion. 💛 And... go! @Dreamy @MissinTooth @Bow @Shaz51 @Captain24 @creative_writer @avant-garde @Oaktree @ENKELI @Dimity @Semly @Appleblossom @MJG017 @Sunnyside226 @Blackcloud @PeppyPatti @Till23  @Jynx @tyme @Ru-bee @rav3n @RiverSeal 

Read discussion
12
172
How To: Recovery Focused Posting
Jynx

about 1 month ago

How To: Recovery Focused Posting

Hi there SANE Forums Fam!     This how-to guide was designed to help you post to the forums and create safety for yourself and others when talking about those tough topics, such as suicidal ideation and self-harm related thoughts and urges.    We hope that this guide will help you to share safely about thoughts of suicide and self-harm, and seek support from others who understand what you are going through.      What is recovery focused posting?    When we talk about posting in a way that is recovery-oriented or recovery focused, we are encouraging posting in a way that protects both you, and the community. We let the community know what we need, so that it means even on the tough days, we are all here to support each other's safety and well-being.    What it is -  a way to communicate our needs so we can get the right support all about keeping the community safe  a way for us all to keep working on building our resilience and capacity What it isn't -  about banning or forbidding discussion of the difficult topics a requirement to 'always be positive' or to pretend we're feeling okay when we're not a restriction on sharing big, dark, or difficult feelings Having a 'recovery focus' is all about highlighting our needs, what's worked for us before, and what may or may not be helpful for us now. It helps reduce confusion and concern, helps reduce anxiety for members reading along, and reduces the risk of us triggering or getting triggered. It can even be empowering for us, in helping us learn to identify our support and recovery needs and practice communicating them to the people around us.    Here are some examples of ways we can make our posts recovery focused:       For many members and readers here on the SANE Forums, thoughts of suicide and struggles with self-harm are a common part of their mental health or life journey. It's often difficult to talk about these topics, so we want folks to feel like they can be open about what they're going through - without the risk of accidentally encouraging each others rumination or risky behaviours.   If you are thinking about suicide, reaching out for support and talking about it is an important step to make sure that you get the right help when you need it most. The forums offers a judgement-free space to express ourselves, and we want to continue to encourage people to feel safe in sharing their story here. Creating a safe community starts with how we use our language.   Safe language is important because:   It allows others to feel capable and comfortable with providing us with support.   It can protect others from common triggers and help someone else who is sitting with thoughts of suicide too.   How we talk about suicide in the Forums is important for you, and for your fellow community members.      Before you post to the Forums    The SANE Forums are a peer support community where most of the support is provided by peers. This makes it a great place to seek support from others who understand what you are going through.    It's important to note though, the SANE Forums cannot provide crisis support. We have put together some questions you can ask yourself before posting to work out whether it’s the SANE Forums or a crisis service that might be the best option for you in the moment (adapted from the Chatsafe online resource).    Where is the right place/service for me to ensure I get the right help at the right time? If you are thinking about suicide, it’s important to get the right help at the right time.     We have a flow chart to help you decide where the right place or service might be for you to seek help. This includes when it is okay to post to the SANE Forums, or when crisis services or emergency support might be the best avenue get the support you need.        As a peer-to-peer support service, the SANE Forums can’t provide crisis support   This is because:  Most of the peer support that is offered across the forums comes from other members just like you. In a crisis, or when you are feeling unsafe, it is important that help comes from people who are trained to provide crisis support.  The nature of online forums mean that replies aren’t instant. This means you may not get the help exactly when you need it.  We do have Moderators and Peer Support Workers online 24/7 to monitor posts and offer support when needed, but the nature of forums means we can’t always be as responsive as you might need in a crisis. That’s where phone or webchat crisis supports are a good option to get timely support.   Language can be ambiguous or interpreted in different ways in online, which is why when we are concerned that someone might be thinking about suicide, we check in via post or email, and refer to crisis support  What am I hoping to get out of sharing my story? (aka: my purpose and needs)    People talk about experiences of suicide for many reasons. This includes seeking help and support for thoughts of suicide, to raise awareness, or to support another person who might be going through something similar. There are lots of different reasons. Understanding your reason/purpose will help you work out the right avenue to meet your needs.     What parts of my story am I comfortable to share and how will I feel when I share? (aka: my privacy and wellbeing)   We all have different boundaries around how much of ourselves and our story we feel comfortable to share in a public space.    Ensuring you feel safe to share when talking about thoughts of suicide is important, whether that is in an online space, a private space (eg: with a counsellor or mental health professional), or with a trusted person in our lives.       How can I write my story in a way that ensures I get the support I need AND is safe for others reading?   Think about how you would write your story and whether you are in a space to be able to write in a way that is safe for all to read.     We have some tips to help you do this. You can also look at our Community Guidelines.   How can I write about thoughts of suicide safely?    Let the community know that you are safe:  If you are posting about suicide, and are safe, then include that in your post.  For example: “I have been coping with thoughts of suicide, but I am safe. I am looking for support from my peers”;“Today has been really difficult, and I don’t know if I can keep doing this, but I am safe tonight and will reach out to a helpline if I feel I need to”  or; “I am someone who lives with thoughts of suicide each day, but if they get worse tonight I will go for a walk and speak with a friend. I am safe for now” If you aren’t feeling safe, it’s time to log off the forums and access crisis support.    Use safe language:  Our words have power, and it’s important that we use trauma safe language when talking about suicide on the forums. By trauma safe language, we mean language that is not graphic, upsetting or triggering for others to read. This includes staying away from graphic detail including means or plans, and making sure you are clear and direct about your current safety.   Use trigger warnings:  Help other forum members make an informed decision about whether to read on by including a trigger warning.  You might add TW: mentions suicide in your title, or include Trigger warning: mentions thoughts of suicide in the first line of your post.  Avoid mentioning methods of suicide:  Many members of the forums may have experience of suicidal thoughts, feelings or behaviours, and might be triggered, upset or impacted by mentions of methods.   Instead, remove the methods of suicide and replace with more general statements such as “I think about action to end my life”, or “I have had thoughts of methods before”. You can still get your story across without listing the method.    Let the community know what support you are looking for/what you need:  You know what you need best, and letting others know means they can provide more effective support to you when you need it most.     For example:  “I just need someone to sit with me right now”, “I would like some suggestions” or, “I need some distraction”    I often hear Moderators/Peer Workers ask the question “Are you feeling safe for now?”. What does it mean?    If we have reason to believe that you might be thinking about suicide, we will check in to see how you are feeling, and whether you are currently thinking about suicide.  You may hear us ask if you are safe, but safety can mean many things, so let’s define what we mean in the context of suicide.     “Are you safe for now?”:  If we are concerned that you might be thinking about suicide, we will ask you if you are safe for now. What we mean is, are you planning to act on thoughts of suicide now?    "I am safe for now":  If you are safe for now, we will encourage you to reach out and seek peer support through the forums. There are a lot of other people here sitting with thoughts of suicide too who know what it’s like to take steps towards safety.     For many people, thoughts of suicide can be ongoing, so we may ask a few times as safety might change from hour to hour, or day to day. That’s why we say safety for now, as we are trying to understand your immediate safety and offer appropriate support.     This is especially important in public online spaces where we don’t have the same communication options as we would in real life settings.     It can be really helpful to have a safety plan prepared for times when you might have thoughts of suicide, which will help you take steps to seek help or safety. Beyondnow is a great online tool to help you build a safety plan.    "I am not able to stay safe":  If you tell us you are not able to stay safe, we will ask you to confirm if you are planning to end your life and if you have a plan. This will happen off the forums and via email.     If you aren't able to or aren't sure that you can stay safe, this is when it is time to step off the forums and access immediate crisis support. In an emergency, the best place to seek help is to call 000, or go to your local emergency department.     As a mental health service, SANE can be a safe space to share if you are feeling unsafe, and we will get emergency help to you.    As mandatory reporters, if a forum member tells us or indicates that they are in serious and imminent risk of harm, including planning to end their life now, then we do contact emergency services. This is an important part of ensuring the safety and wellbeing of those who access our services.     Mandatory reporting is (as the name suggests) mandatory by law, which ensures that every health service, including SANE, are looking out for the safety and wellbeing of the people we support.      When might Moderators, Community Managers or Peer Support Workers step in?   The SANE Forums team may step in when a post breaches our safety guidelines, and could impact the safety of the person posting or the wellbeing of those reading.     We will remove or edit posts that mention or imply: A person intends to end their life, or doesn’t confirm safety in a way that could be upsetting for those reading. This includes where there are ambiguous mentions or inferences to suicide without confirming safety.  Methods of suicide or self harm  Graphic descriptions    Check out the suggestions earlier in this post to help you stay within the guidelines.  We will email members to:  Check in to see if a member is safe for now and offer referrals to crisis support  Check in with others who may have been upset by something they have read on the forums  Let members know if a post is removed or edited Offer suggestions of how to bring posts back in line with the guidelines  Let a member know if we are involving emergency services, if doing so doesn't put the person at further risk of harm SANE has a responsibility to keep the Forums safe for everyone. This means that there may be times we will need to make tough decisions to remove a post, email you about the guidelines, or pause an account.     If we are concerned about your safety, we want to make sure you have access to crisis services, and we will refer to options such as:  National crisis services such as Lifeline (13 11 14)  and Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467). You can find a list of crisis services at the top of every page on the SANE Forums.  000 in an emergency  SANE’s other support services  Other services specific to your situation (eg: 1800Respect, BlueKnot, Mensline…)   Summary Here are the key points:  It’s important we can talk about topics like suicide and self-harm here on the forums  How we talk about suicide is key to creating safety for the person posting, and those reading  Using safe language, trigger warnings and letting the community know you are safe, and what you need, can help ensure you get the help you deserve, while also looking out for the community  SANE staff may reach out to ask if you are safe and offer referrals to crisis supports. We may also remove posts that breach our safety guidelines around talking about suicide  If you are unsafe and at imminent and serious risk of harm, we are required by law to get emergency help to you  Thanks for reading along folks 😊

Read discussion
6
0
Hobbies and Projects
How To
Welcome! Introduce yourself here 🙂
Daisydreamer

3 days ago

Welcome! Introduce yourself here 🙂

New here? Welcome to the SANE Forums! We are so happy you found us and have joined our wonderful community. There are lots of people here like you, who can understand what you might be going through and offer valuable peer support.     You may see members reaching out to share their stories, asking questions about mental health, looking for others who get it, seeking support and offering support. We hope you find this a supportive and welcoming space to be.    We want to get to know you, and introduce you to other members of the SANE Community.    To get started, you can simply post here by clicking "reply" to introduce yourself and a fun fact or two about you.    Or, you can introduce yourself to the community by starting a new discussion thread! How to do that you ask? Follow the below steps to create your first post.   Click back into the Welcome & Getting Started topic area Click the ‘New Discussion’ Button Type in a subject title Enter your post (there are some helpful tips on how you can introduce yourself below) Then click post! You may see our Peer Support Workers welcoming new members in this space, so please reach out if you have any questions, or if we can help you get started 🙂 We are always happy to help! To reach us, @moderator or email us at team@saneforums.org. We look forward to getting to chatting soon

Read discussion
34
1,580
Newbie's Social Club - Come make some friends!
Jynx

2 days ago

Newbie's Social Club - Come make some friends!

Hey Forumites!!    This is a space for members new and old, to gather around and help make our newer members feel welcome!    We've all been newbies ourselves at some point, and can empathise with how incredibly daunting it can be entering a new space. A lot of folks have trouble even knowing where to start, and (even though we're in the midst of improving it all) we know the forums can be a tricky space to navigate - which can make it very difficult for newbies to be able to find their footing! On top of that, joining any established community means being 'the new kid on the block', and seeing others connecting easily with established relationships can sometimes feel like we aren't welcome, or that we need to 'break in' to the conversation somehow.    Well this space aims to alleviate that pressure and help facilitate some new connections! Whether you're brand new here or you've been here since the very beginning, you're welcome to come hang out, meet some new people, reconnect with others, and maybe even make a new friend!   We will try to tag new members as they join, so help us make them feel welcome!  Here's today's newest forumites: @noodles1  @IndigOverwhelm  @Sam63  @Sosad01  @jsbpd  @JJll  @Andora  @riotgrrl  @HopeEverlasting  @Bellle    Feel free to tell us a little about yourself, what brought you to the forums, and what you're looking for here!   Tagging in our lovely bunch of Community Guides too! They're seasoned members who volunteer their time and energy towards making the forums a safe and welcoming place for everyone. We wouldn't have the community we do without their efforts and their passion! Feel free to reach out to them, they're always quite happy to help guide and support 😊 @Anastasia @BPDSurvivor @Eve7 @Faith-and-Hope @MDT @Judi9877 @outlander @Shaz51 @Snowie @wellwellwellnez @Zoe7     

Read discussion
8
1,309
1 - 10 of 10
Cappuccino|New Contributor|Last message about 1 hour ago
New to this TW DV

I don't know how to go about this. In short I have a stack of mental disorders like autism, ADHD, PTSD and so on. 2.5years ago I escaped a domestic violence situation with my partner at the time being the abuser. I have day to day struggles but my biggest struggle currently is family, I'm living with my parents and my sister just moved in with her fiance and 2 kids. My sister has abused me a lot growing up, she would play sick psychological games on me as well as causing physical harm to me (she doesn't cause me physical harm anymore) I'm so scared of her now though and I do think that contributed to why I stayed with the abusive ex for so long. Everyone in this house treats me differently, I have tried to please everyone and make them like me or at least convince myself that they do. I feel like I'm going crazy, the subtle animosity in this house and then being gaslit into thinking that they don't mean harm. The only person that doesn't treat me poorly (for the most part) is my dad, though when I bring these issue's to his attention he always claims his 'unaware' and 'oblivious' which yes they are his words. I don't know what to do, I feel like I'm constantly being taken advantage of and made out to be crazy because I'm autistic. I feel like I'm just hopping between one abusive home onto another.

  • 0
  • 0
charlie18|New Contributor|Last message 25 minutes ago
Broke up with my boyfriend

My boyfriend came out as trans mtf and I end our relationship. Ik for me personally it wouldn't work but I love them so much. It's all really fresh and I'm struggling

  • 0
  • 2
Weeb|Casual Contributor|Last message 25 minutes ago
Adult diagnosis on a uni student budget

So long story short, I had a psychotic but spiritual episode. I'm trying to get diagnosed primarily for ADHD with sensory issues, but likely have secondary presentations of OCD, aspergers and possibly bipolar. It's hard navigating the health system on a camel cash budget. So far I'm in the Gold Coast and have been referred through the mental health team at the southport precinct and had 2 visits, but to get diagnosed they told me it will cost money. And I don't think I have enough for that. Is there any free way to get diagnosed? Other gps have referred me to some and the first one I checked said it would cost $750 just for the initial consult. I'm a broke uni student here. I don't even have that much money to my name. Other referrals from other gps have either come back saying they don't diagnose for adhd, and I'm honestly here wondering if self admitting to a mental ward would be the only way to get diagnosed for free.

  • 0
  • 3
cdtofi|Contributor|Last message about 1 hour ago
Bit more of my life

Hi there again Had a draining few days. Not real sure, well I suppose I really am sure why.? ‘So I’m trying to tell a lie. Just joking I wouldn’t lie to save myself Well that reminds me of a memory 🥲 I had this older brother My mother would say Who done this or that Always cdtofi  done it mum TW: abuse   Content/trigger warning (Highlight to read) So he would hold me down on the bed while I was physically abused [edited by moderator]. Knowing full well that he done it. He done it all my life. always lying about me. I was known to be the liar of the house just because of him.I was raped. I was not believed about anything. So in the end I just said I lied.. Then I was punished. I went to school had to come straight home from the bus. Shut the gate & don’t go out of it for 3 months.   So he would hold me down on the bed while I was physically abused [edited by moderator]. Knowing full well that he done it. He done it all my life. always lying about me. I was known to be the liar of the house just because of him.I was raped. I was not believed about anything. So in the end I just said I lied.. Then I was punished. I went to school had to come straight home from the bus. Shut the gate & don’t go out of it for 3 months.   Then as I was growing up he threw me on the floor but I was saved someone came thru the door. ‘I’m gonna tell mum on you” She won’t believe you He was correct.   He was maybe the worst person(there was a heap) in my life. Fancy having to grow up with a brother like that My father said to the person interviewing me get the truth out of her anyway you can So I was physically abused. That should not be allowed. I was a child.‘The story did not change.   Everywhere I went when I was growing up abuse, abuse, I did not have to go far. I lived with it daily just by being born a girl in that family.   My father said to my mother. Don’t show them any Emotion I want them to grow up TOUGH.  No love, nothing. No one to turn to for help as no one would believe me Sorry if I have said too much. Just telling the truth Its no wonder I am a recluse aye??? It’s just a shame the Government wasn’t in back then to protect kids. Because that’s what I needed   Not sure what I’m allowed to write on here   Recovery Club…..   Well  I believe that’s what I’m starting this week. Bit excited 50 mins first up. Not sure that will be long enough to get all the animals out of my head in 1 session. But will see how I go.

  • 0
  • 1
Dog_lover|New Contributor|Last message about 2 hours ago
Not feeling good enough

Hey, first post on here so trying this because tonight I’m just feeling super low and not feeling good enough. Moments of jealousy by watching someone else live the life I want and I just don’t know what to do anymore 😭

  • 2
  • 1
Whiplash|New Contributor|Last message about 2 hours ago
Supporting a parent with bipolar

Hi! New member here 🫶🏼 I have been supporting my mother with her mental health since I was 12 (about 10 years ago now). Typically, she goes through periods of mania that require hospitalisation, and when she returns home she becomes herself again through medication alterations and visits from a mental health team. However, currently, she has little signs of improvement after being hospitalised twice and I’m not too sure how to support her as a daughter. I have assisted her with going to hospital, letting her know I care about her and that this will pass, but it has gotten to the point where she is very paranoid about everyone around her and is planning on quitting her job. She also speaks really poorly about my dad which a lot of these things do get to me mentally and I’m not too sure how much more I can cope with supporting her, which is just overall making me feel guilty. I’m just looking for anything really, advice, words of support, or anyone who may be in the same boat. I want to say that I know it will get better and she’ll come out of it but it just feels like a lost cause at this point, and it’s beginning to really harm our relationship which hurts the most. thank you, and sorry for the spiel lol  

  • 1
  • 1
john74|Senior Contributor|Last message about 3 hours ago
Sunday night

Hi ll am feeling totally overwhelmed atm I share a house with a young couple whom argue regularly and are rude and don't speak to me. I have been through a dv marriage which ended 2 years ago l was abused etc for years by my ex wife.Then l got a tirade off the male house mate yesterday. It just bought back all of the bad stuff from the past.plus now l have financial stress until l find another tennant which too months last time. Still having trouble finding work and stress about upcoming surgery.  

  • 3
  • 3
andy_707|Casual Contributor|Last message about 1 hour ago
Feeling lonely and scared to connect

Hi guys 👋🏻 i just found out about this forum and wanted to give it a go. Apologies in advance for my english since is no my first language. I’ve been living in Melbourne few years now but i was never be able to connect truly with people, and that make you feel pretty lonely, especially realising slowly the cultural shock. I’m thinking that maybe I’ve carried the pain of loneliness for too long. And I feel ashamed of the desperate need I have for company and understanding, along with intimacy and connection.I look for comfort in the eyes of strangers passing by, while a part of me cries at the thought that they ignore me, i’m no way to be seen, to be felt. Plus i’ve been in a particular crisis these past few days, because I now have to find a new place to live (I have 57 days left) since the property I’m living in has been sold. I also need to find a job that can sponsor me to stay here in Australia. On top of that, I’d like to date or connect with someone, but I feel so ashamed of the desperation I feel when I seek human connection.I find myself having to manage all of this on my own. Sometimes I’m paralyzed by fear. I completely dissociate and i’m like I don’t know how to keep going , and i’m sure there are so many people feeling similar. Thank you to let me share

  • 2
  • 5
Catlady1979|Senior Contributor|Last message about 2 hours ago
TW: Religious/Spiritual Trauma

Hey Everyone, In these past few weeks I've been in the process of leaving a church environment that was unhealthy and somewhat unwelcoming. It was a Pentecostal church and I was there on and off for nearly 4 years - This place has caused me more trauma than both of the DV relationships I was in combined. The things that have affected me the most were the following. 💔 Being told to repent of the "sin" of depression during a prayer meeting by two women who actually admitted that they weren't even counsellors - That should've been a big bright red flag in hindsight. Word of advice, if they are not trained counsellors in any field in any capacity then please do not go to them at all. 💔 Social rejection was another issue and I wasn't the only one who faced it. Being blocked on social media and avoided in person not by one, not by two but by three so-called "church" family members for reasons unknown to me was really hurtful and I continued to worship and fellowship at this place for quite a long time after that all happened until I couldn't anymore when my mental health started to really decline. With that said, being blocked by three people was not my main reason for leaving but it was one of several reasons. What am I doing now? ❤️‍🩹 I'm in the process of transitioning to another church and it's going okay - Hymns based on scripture are far more calming and peaceful than the super loud rock concert style worship music I had just walked away from. This new church has been fairly welcoming and I like the way the Reverend actually advises his congregation to read the word as he preaches. ❤️‍🩹 I'm about to start therapy for spiritual/religious trauma - It will help me process what's happened and how to navigate my faith in a healthier way. I'm a work in progress and I'm always under construction 🕊️

  • 3
  • 2
LostAngel|Senior Contributor|Last message about 1 hour ago
Major Self Doubt Day /I Must Fix Everything Fix All The Important Stuff and Fix it Now Cause I feel Like A Failure,

Hi Friends Yes Something Is Definetly Not Right With Me Just a short Back story On why Im At This Point ,1, My Family is Bassically on the verge of homelessness in a matter of months due to A Council Rates Debt which Has Forced Us into Having To Get All The Important Matters Organised in A Very Quick Manner Things Such As Where Are We Going To Live ,Wheres Our Bellongings Going,Reapplying For Our Birth Certificates For Applying For Private Rental Properties,Looking At Private Rental Properties ,Ok Next Line Of Line Of ISSues ,2 I have no Car and No Job Currently and thats a stress too Cause Obviously we need Financial means to do this and I basically Feel Like A Failure In all Areas,Im The Eldest Of 3 Siblings,Mums In Aged Care ,Dad Passed Years Ago which Ive most likely Mentioned at some point on here Previously,Anyway Its A lot Of Big Issues at Once And its Upto Me , Que The Next Issue We are now At A stage Of After Attempts To Negotiate We Are In Limbo On Waiting For The Local Councils Decision about a Second attempt at putting in a hardship application and basically waiting to see wether they say yes or No So Basically They Decide Wether Where Forced To Move House ,theres more I could add about The Family Home But Ill Move onto The Next Issue ,Is it number 4 issue? well anyaway the next life issue is Ive Been Attempting to DeVelop An Online Relationship With A man and Yes This Time this Particallar Man Is verfied as Being Real And Genuine Towards Me Anyway The Isue Within The Relationship Isnt Him Its Me You see I keep Having Issues with Vulnrabilty even though I see No Red Flags Whatsoever In Fact Its All Green Flags But My Stupid Brain for Some Reason Is fowling The Whole Situation up By Trying To look For red flags That arnt there , The Green Flags Have Been weve seen each other on Video Call, Live Video Call,Voice Phone Call,Texting but Predominately We Video call and Voice Call and All His Pictures Match Up With His Name ,And His Calm and Loving and Open And Honest To share His Life with Me ,Being Long Distance He daily Tries to Show Me on Video CalL Where He Works ,another green Flag He works 2 Jobs and is clearly a very Hard worker from Our interactions, Hes shown Me around his local City By video,Introduced Me to Friends of His via Vidoe Call and its amazing our Like Care free and real he is with showing me his everyday routine where he shops,works,ect So Anyway As Great As All That IS My Stupid Brain Is Having This Habit Of Anytime He Tries To Form THat Genuine Loving Connection With Me Through Sharing His Life I go Into Like A closing Off Mode And Hang up On his Calls Frquently like I go into My shell And really Shy AWAY from His Loving Nature which Is Really Sad ,I tend to Make Up These Scenarios In My Head That Im somehow bothering him Even Though Hes being So open And Carefree With Me ,Mind You Hes seeing The raw Real Side of Me unbrushed hair ect ,Bad emotional Days And yet he Somehow Still Loves me ,I dont Know why I keep subconciously Rebuffing his attempt at Developing The Relationship Further Even Though Yes I do Have Feelings For him Also ,Like I dont Know If Im not Communicating Fully About How I feel About Him And All That ,Cause Yes Im scared Of Being Hurt, Anyway next Issue I got Sick Last night felt really Unwell Suddenly and called him To Have his support and Company but Instead of fully allowing him to Support me I somehow Rebuffed his care yet again which again is sad ,Im sabotaging a great realtaionship subconciously or something and then to top it off because of all these things happening at once and Not Having much Control over certain things and all that Im Having Alot Of Anxiety and Self Doubt and Feeling Like A failure In every area Theres so much More I should Be trying to do better and Yet for all My suposed effort that I think Im doing for each area its instead amounting to nothing ,so Now Today Im trying To Yet again Figure it all out and Im asking Myself What Is The key To Success in life cause at the momment it doesnt seem like im succedding very much in anything wether that be romantic relationship ,House Car ,Job All Those Important Foundations That I still Dont Have In Place anyway End Of Rnat For Now ,I am Safe just Really Disatisfied with my life 

  • 0
  • 1

My favourites

Members feature!Log in to add spaces, events and discussions to your favourites.
SANE Forums resources

All resources

SANE Forums services

All services

Guidelines and technical support

All guidelines and technical support

Crisis support

SANE services are not designed for crisis support. If you require immediate support, please contact one of the service providers below.

All crisis support
Members online

No one is online right now. Hold tight and someone will be along soon.

If you need urgent assistance, see Need help now
For mental health information, support, and referrals, contact SANE Support Services
SANE Forums is published by SANE with funding from the Australian Government Department of Health
SANE - ABN 92 006 533 606
PO Box 1226, Carlton VIC 3053